![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/8eba7f06-64a9-4bdf-8349-ed6c63d6abc9_rw_1920.jpg?h=9b8f7e128a2d5e58f45c949f330e68f0)
Side Effects May Include
September 2022
46 x 29 x 10 in. (approx.)
testosterone gel boxes, testosterone tubes, cardboard, cardstock, velcro
Photoshop
This piece represents multiple facets of my experience of social and medical transition during my first year on testosterone.
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/106cfbee-0fe6-4860-b7eb-48c17bd3e0f6_rw_1920.jpg?h=ccf3103fcc5949838f9fdbf0939c2081)
The armor, made out of testosterone gel boxes and gel tubes, reflects a self-chosen physical imposition on my body that bestows protection but also restriction.
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/aac26ad6-1353-431d-ae87-45a4e508ee04_rw_1920.jpg?h=2ed162983dc125e31bb948514477a13e)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/bf280298-a996-493b-8e93-64ea4fbe55f1_rw_1920.jpg?h=d25b761e7eacf1658d027964acf5e9c3)
Spikes on the helmet and heart represent an outwards explosion of self: my internal sense of being, finally realized in the external world, coupled with the massive positive shift in my mental and emotional quality of life.
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/494aa87f-15ab-4b7d-95b5-3d8c34ae0959_rw_1920.jpg?h=cba7fa0d6ea03493899475b6d1fbe63f)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/e61fd13b-ff37-4347-a381-031737432e16_rw_3840.jpg?h=10be7312c737c8ff1c5392ecc70b0d0a)
The gorget highlights the most significant part of my physical changes - my voice. It offers protection to one of the most vulnerable points on the body, but it can also be seen as a collar. My new voice protects me from internal dysphoria and external misgendering as a woman, but restricts me by imposing external misgendering as a man. This restriction also comes with its own protection of the social privilege afforded to bodies perceived as male.
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/3c6aac44-d540-42d6-a2de-7f3155a4b845_rw_1920.jpg?h=56332b5c8db455dff1ee5684b8407a2f)
Pauldrons cover my upper arms and shoulders where I apply testosterone gel each morning. The attached metal gel tubes and the restriction to mobility reflect difficulties I encountered in getting the proper form of medication: for four months, I received testosterone from a manufacturer whose formula cause daily discomfort from stickiness.
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/41ec98b4-9ad2-4d80-8c0e-9d33574b37d7_rw_1920.jpg?h=8ad4dcf324834a28936609a2846fe368)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/effe048e-af8e-48ed-84b5-7a046544a292_rw_1920.jpg?h=32dfb4892c833f43cd0877a478d9eb03)
Chains attached to my ear and hand reflect the many phone calls and pharmacy visits I made in order to reliably access medication. These chains restrict movement, but they also act as ornaments. This dichotomy acknowledges the systemic difficulties I faced in gaining consistent access to HRT, alongside the financial and temporal privileges I hold to have the time, insurance, ability, and money to face and overcome these difficulties.
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/7c018906-e1cb-46dc-8e42-4fd334297eec_rw_1920.jpg?h=f49f18f819bd6924cc1b85492843bb27)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/edc9912d-6a30-4494-97dd-a9a215e0eb8d_rw_1920.jpg?h=da3c5a87058c13fafa474baf36ae7206)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/1cd1b2ed-49f3-4ccb-919c-ec8ad51c1ca7_rw_1920.jpg?h=581ef4f4ee21bc116489195fdd93fae1)
Finally, the torso harness evokes the outlines of a chest binder. It is tight enough to stop me from taking deep breaths, like a real binder. Patches indicate how I use TransTape as an alternative to binding.
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/c1a7ef70-1b3e-46b2-911e-614820ead873_rw_1920.jpg?h=d8728ae40520534d1cc21989a291030f)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/9b6f8c8a-3099-46c3-aca7-55a443d341ea_rw_3840.jpg?h=043eeb68f41f7524c39b5c1e499f926e)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/8d687bcc-f402-4bb0-9e9e-111682290a0e_rw_3840.jpg?h=e58c2a3ae4cd2667644c76f047a571d3)
![](https://cdn.myportfolio.com/0c28fc0c-7d3d-4df3-9819-5d76e36e7794/b7006abc-74d5-4821-9708-9f77341fcd8f_rw_3840.jpg?h=9c37055a4aebf6f7c5c980fc0698c3fd)